Life & Deadlines
Do you always feel like time is running out and you have not done enough with your life? Or, that there is a particular time for everything?
I see others around me always talking about how they are always running out of time; that they needed to do something but couldn't because there just wasn't enough time!
Now, I am no Time Management Guru, and I have had my share of 'Oh no, time is up!' moments but I find this obsession with time all around me rather ridiculous.
This is especially when it comes to people putting deadlines on their lives, and I feel most of it is dictated by Society. Deadline to study, the deadline to marry, the deadline to having children, buying a house, buying a car, being 'adults,' doing this and doing that, etc., etc. etc. etc.
Now, do not get me wrong I do have quite a few things on my bucket list, but somehow I do not have a deadline for any. I do not know if that makes me less efficient or more independent. You choose however you want to define me.
I like to believe I am just me.
I am 28 now, so according to the societal timeline, I should be married with children or at least married, or at least looking for a possible future partner. I am doing none of them and have no intention of doing either.
I am single and much to a lot of people's disappointment and disbelief, quite happy. (Now, the reason behind that can be a topic for another day.)
As a child, I knew, I always wanted to do three things, and in the exact order I am about to write: Do my P.h.D. (yes, I thought that came first, yes, I was a genius child), then do my Masters and then my Bachelors. You see my family loves to study. We have a few gold medalists here and there, and most have a basic Bachelor in a varied array of subjects.
So, for me doing further studies was more of a question of 'when.'
Of course, while growing up (by now I knew Bachelors and Masters came before), I thought by the time I will be 30 I should finish my P.h.D. on T.S. Eliot. After which I would naturally become a world renowned writer (I mean but of course!!!).
But, due to unexpected twists and turns in my life, here I am, thinking about what to do next. And, no I have not done my P.h.D. I have finished my Bachelors and Masters which was followed by a Professional Certificate. (I worked in between here and there for about 5 and half years). But, No P.h.D. I do not think that is happening anytime soon either. I mean I see some of my friends pursuing their P.h.Ds, and I feel I do not have the brain capacity to read, remember and write so much. Maybe as a child, I was too naive, but now I know better.
Anyway, I digress. The point is, I have in all honesty no idea what the future holds for me. But, I know for a fact that if I have to start studying now for something entirely new and begin working from the bottom rung up, I would be more than happy to do so.
I feel there is only one life, why put so many deadlines on it. I do crave companionship, but I do want to force some poor soul into marrying me, just because the society deems it proper. I do not want either one of us to suffer because it was 'our time' to marry and 'settle down.'
I do want to have children some day ( I want to adopt, to be honest), but I do not know when; maybe when I turn 30 or 40 or 50. I just know that when the time is right I will know.
No, I am not confused or immature or trying to sound philosophical. I have learned from mistakes. From mine, from others' and now I know, that you cannot force anything to happen, when it is not its time to.
I do believe in hard work; I believe in patience and grit, but I also believe that our lives are not defined by deadlines.
I feel that so many of us, do not truly live because we chase these invisible deadlines which if not met with, make us feel incomplete.
Those are all the thoughts I have about deadlines today. I shall now go and plop myself in front of Netflix and forget about the world for a bit.
Tata!
TODAY'S CHECKLIST:
- Exercise: 6193 steps, Fit Test to FitStar daily exercises. Lower body stronger than the upper body!
- Food:
- Breakfast: Egg and oats pancake with green and red capsicum
- Lunch: Rice, dal, Spring Onion and potato curry, fish
- Snack: 2 nolen gurer mishti, churmur.
- Dinner: Salad
- Study: Stanford, finished a module. (Brain feels like jelly, it was tough)
- Read: Started A Clash of Kings
- Feeling: Happy. Periods stopped! :D