writing

2022 Chapter XI Section VII

Let’s write!

When I was 10 years old, I knew what I wanted to do; finish my BA, then MA, do my Ph.D. in T.S. Eliot and then become a writer. I would tell this to everyone who met me. I loved (still do) literature, especially English literature. I loved to read, discuss what I read, and write. I would write a lot.

In the past 24 years, so much has changed. I work in a field that didn't even exist when I was young. I love what I do now. I especially love all the people I have met on this journey.

But, recently, I have been thinking about that 10-year-old who was so certain about her future. I want to get back to that level of passion and confidence I seem to have lost now. Life has a way of doing that.

Of course, as you grow up, priorities change, and responsibilities take over. Also, I feel I have lost the art of writing.

I still read a lot, but I barely discuss any of the books anymore because who has time, right? I definitely do not write much, though I am trying to get back to it.

Maybe I will not leave my day job yet to become a full-time writer, but I would love to go back to being passionate about my first love of writing. I may not be a great writer, but I feel so happy and free when I write, just like I used to as a 10-year-old.

2020 Chapter II Section 9

Dear Stranger,

We have never met before,

We might never meet again.

But the heart felt something,

That’s hard to explain.

I saw you only once,

But, somehow I cannot forget.

Your smile, the twinkle in your eyes,

My beating heart and how I felt.

This is not love,

I know that for sure.

I don’t know what it is,

Or what’s the cure.

To you I am nothing,

More than a stranger.

But in my heart’s story,

I am Ron and you are my Hermione Granger.

2017 Chapter I Section 31

One Habit, Two Habit & Three: First Month of Blogging! 

I have always loved to write. I find it being the best way to express myself. I am sadly not the most skilled at it, but I try. 

One of the things, I wanted to do this year was to read and write more. I do read a lot in general, be it articles, blogs, new papers or something very general. I read books too. I used to read a lot more, but I still try to finish a book every few weeks. I want to increase those numbers, though. 

But, writing was something I was not doing at all. Maybe it's something I like to believe in, or maybe there might be some real truth to it, but I feel when I write more, I am more aware and feel smarter. 

I do not know if that makes sense or not but when I write I feel like my brain opens up, I can feel my pupils dilating as if it is ready to absorb more from the universe than it normally does. I do not exactly know how to convey it to you, but I just feel more alive. 

I have always loved writing. I do not like to talk much. I mean to most people. I have my selected bunch of people I would like to have a phone or one on one conversation with and with the rest I would rather message or chat. 

I sometimes feel quite lucky that I live in the technological era that I do because emailing and messaging systems have made this anxiety-driven person a lot more social than she could have hoped to be. 

So, basically, I am saying that writing is my outlet for my thoughts. Everyone needs an outlet, and this is mine. I do not like to divulge much of my life to others. But, through writing, I feel I get the feeling of sharing and so the need to reveal my secrets also go away. 

When I was young, I used to write in my diary, but since I have developed Fibromyalgia, the task of physically writing has been quite difficult. I do send occasional emails to the self, but in general, I haven't really 'talked to myself' in a long while. (I do believe we should all have more conversations with the self so we can learn to filter a few unnecessary things we say aloud to others.)

This New Years when everyone was busy with their celebrations and resolutions, I decided I have to promise to talk to me more or at least to express my thoughts more. Now, my outlets are few and most I do not like. Also, I wanted to hold myself accountable and what's a better way than to write on a social platform.

I know hardly anyone reads my blog, but the fact that I have convinced my brain that every day I need to write about something or the other, that I need to think more, has led me to do that exact thing. 

I honestly have enjoyed writing every day this month, and this has become sort of a habit now. Barring the few days when I was very sick, I have made it a point to take some time off each day from everything, sit down and write. 

I am happy I have been able to write almost every day of the month. I have noticed because writing has become such a habit; it has started affecting my other habits too. I love to follow my routine of exercises, food, reading, and studying. 

I know for a while I was not well enough to do any of it. And, knowing my health issues, there might be more days like that. But, I have noticed a positive change in my mindset. I now feel bad when I miss out something. And, instead of dismissing it or finding excuses for missing out on something I want to do. I just simply find a way to make sure I do it or at least find an alternative. 

I am positive that one good habit can permeate to create other good ones. I look forward to them, and I look forward to writing what's on my mind every single day this year! 

Thank you, stranger, for reading! :) 

Tata! 

TODAY'S CHECKLIST:

  • Exercise: 1944 steps 
  • Food:
    • Breakfast: None (Woke up late, still haven't been to fix my sleep pattern)
    • Lunch: Rice, Rajma, Cauliflower and Potato Curry
    • Snack: French Toast
    • Dinner: Soup
  • Study: Stanford
  • Read: None
  • Feeling: Happy! Tonsils hurt but rest seem to be working.