Who is that, staring back at me in the mirror?
How did I let this get this far?
I feel like I have woken up from a nightmare.
But, am I up yet?
Because this feels like a living nightmare.
I look in the mirror and see someone else,
staring back at me.
That is not me.
Not the me I know so well and love.
No, it is not the body that I care about.
What is this that I have become?
I never knew I hated me so much.
Is this hate? This cannot be love.
What is this?
I love food and that will never change,
But what needs to change is my dependency on it.
My mobility has become weaker.
Knee feels crushed under the increasing weight.
My chest pains from time to time.
While I sleep, my breathing isn’t the same.
I am scared. I truly am scared.
I do not want to get a six pack or a beach body.
I just want less pain and more health.
I know I have so many issues to work on.
Yes, I am working on them.
But, one big thing I have to work on,
Is me.
I know what is needed.
I just have to do it.
This is the time.
NOW is the time.
There may not be a tomorrow if this goes on.