Weight has been a constant struggle of mine since I was a child. Either I weighed too little or too much. Either I am too thin or too fat. I know many who have gone through similar struggles of their own. I am sure my friends here on Facebook can comment and validate that.
I have always found it ridiculous that how, many fail to see the struggle, the pain or the implication that a few simple words put together can have on others; "You are so fat, maybe you should lose some weight!" Alternatively, "You are so thin, you do not eat properly." I have been stupid enough times to let these very words get to me, oh so many times.
I have had many health issues and have gone through different kinds of medication. A lot of those have led to erratic weight gain or loss. Most don’t know that, and that is fine. However, what saddened/saddens me is that when I meet these people (old or new) how much I weigh makes the “Who I am” to them. To them, I am either too lazy or a bad eater or eating too less, etc., etc., etc. I have even met people who insist medication leading to weight gain be just my excuse to hide the real issue, which I am just plain lazy!!! So many times, I have come so very close to punching a few when they say in the most irritatingly cocky/mocking manner; “Oh please if you exercise and ‘diet’ you will lose weight. Look I have done it!” (And, they insist I look at their abs or muscles! Why Why Why!!!?!) Now, I know, I will meet more of these people in future too. I just hope I do not end up punching them!!! ;)
This is what I wanted to/should have said: “Well, dear sir/ma’am, (or person who knows me for exactly 10 seconds), you and I are not the same. What works for you may not work for me! Anyway, thanks for the unwarranted advice and sight. What would I have done in life without that! My hero!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Well, this note is not an online rant about how tired I am of these ridiculous conversations. Yes, I am currently fat (by industry standards) but very healthy! Thank you very much! I exercise regularly and eat well! If that does not satisfy you, well, I do not give a damn. Moreover, no I am not depressed or sad, and nothing is wrong with me or my life. I honestly felt like writing something, and I know of many who have gone through similar struggles and thought sharing on an online forum would be a nice way to purge myself of the negative feelings and feed off the positive ones.
Having said that, let’s get back to the point. How much I weigh on the scale has been the point on which many have judged the who I was/am! No, the two things are not the same. I am not my weight or the fat I have in my body or the lack of it. I am much more than that. I may not be a celebrity or haven’t done anything really that significant with my life, (Yet) I haven’t saved anyone, not even a puppy (they anyway seem to matter much more than human lives anyway) and no I am definitely not on the path to enlightenment of any sort (While I meditate I think of the many mini scripts I want to write or toppings the pizza should have, or sometimes I think of what home improvements can be made to the current room I am sitting in. The last one thanks to my sister who keeps watching these kinds of shows. All the time!). I am most probably not even a very “special” person, not a “genius” and definitely not skilled in most things on earth. Moreover, to be honest, that’s fine.
I realised I am, well, Me!!!
Moreover, I am super happy and proud of that. All the people I have met, all the times I have been able to make people laugh (seems to be more often than I realise), all the great meals I have been able to make, the innumerable hours I have spent studying/working, travelling and trying new cuisines, meeting interesting people, reading, being safe in general (something we actually take for granted most days); through all that I have realised I have lived a pretty decently good life. I have a loving family (all are healthy and hearty), a few crazy friends and a desire to live on to see what’s next. Moreover, I think all these outweighs everything else.
I think the weight that I carry in my heart, of all the love I have received, the memories I have made, the brilliant food I have eaten (Oh, of course, I had to mention this, DUH!), the people I have met, the places I have been to; all that weighs much more than I can ever weigh or not weigh (you know the whole thin/fat thing, in case some people don’t get it).
So, tell me how much do you weigh? (And, all those ready to crack some smart ass joke, do refrain from that. No, seriously I mean it.)
P.S. Of course, while I rant about weighing a beautiful video like this has to pop up. Sometimes the perfect words come from the most unexpected sources! Do watch. #neededthisbadly
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h1I...
